Thursday, September 10, 2015

Trump™ Smells Like Success... Which smells like juniper, iced red currant, coriander, frozen ginger, bamboo leaves, geranium, vetiver, tonka bean, and birch wood.

Like millions of American men and women, I want to know what success smells like. So I will be buying a 3.4 oz. bottle of Trump Success Eau de Toilette for Men this weekend. An amusing description I stumbled upon grabbed my attention and convinced me to give it a try:
“SUCCESS By TRUMP men’s cologne was launched by the designer house of DONALD TRUMP in 2012. This men's fragrance possesses a blend of juniper, iced red currant, coriander, frozen ginger, bamboo leaves, geranium, vetiver, tonka bean, birch wood.”
The “house of Trump”?! What a riot! I didn’t know there was such a thing, although I don’t know why that should surprise me, what with clothing, accessories, jewelry, shoes and watches being sold under the Trump name. Made in China? Yep. Trump is the first to express chagrin at this fact.

Don’t get me wrong; I like Donald Trump, and am not mocking him by my amusement over his cologne. I can spare $22.69, although I prefer to buy $2.99 knock-offs of Eternity, CK one and Obsession, all exceptional values. If I buy it using my Amazon Prime, I not only get free shipping, but can return it for a full refund if I don’t like it. We’ll see if perfumer Yann Vasnier did as good a job for Trump as David Axelrod did for Obama.

If we elect Trump, however, we will not be able to ask for a refund. We have fourteen months to decide, or, if you go by the timeframe to select a Republican nominee, ten months.

The price for Trump’s Empire is a little steep for me; with a suggested retail price of $62.00 and an Amazon’s discounted $52.99, I will start with Success and see how that goes.

Okay, I’m not 100% in agreement with Trump on everything (and I’m not sure I’m crazy about geranium, but you can’t go wrong with musk and sandalwood), but, frankly, if I find another Republican candidate whose positions I’m more in agreement with, I can still be certain that they will not live up to their positions if elected, and would very likely stink as a president. I trust Trump more than I trust the rest.

I’m going to keep looking at Trump seriously. So far, he’s passed the smell test. He is criticized for not being an authentic conservative — a sort of knock-off, if you will. But he’s got it all over the so-called authentic candidates, and I think he’s better equipped to do a knock-up job. A masculine scent at a good price. And if we like it, we can try the shower gel, then let loose with Empire.

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